Out of the norm.
I woke up today at nearly 12 noon. The house was silent, and this feeling of complete emptiness, confusion, and eeriness crept over me. It was apparent that the girls had left for school, and Esther and the baby had gone to run some errands. Usually, I yearn and cherish for the house to be as quiet and empty as it was, but for some reason, the absolute vacancy of it startled me.
I lay in bed, listening to the bustle of outside activities and surveyed the clutter that inhabited my room. In attempt to rid my feelings of uneasiness and mild fright, I decided to take a shower. During my shower, the feeling of uncertainty and the frustration of not knowing where these feelings stemmed from, lingered in the very condensation and moisture that clung on the walls and mirrors of the bathroom. What is it? I thought. What is it? After my 30 minute shower, I emerged from the bathroom and was greeted with the silence that only the absence of all life can give you. This seemed to intensify my tightening nerves.
The feeling of imbalance continued to hover above me as I occupied the computer area with the hopes of ridding myself from this unknown feeling. Then, out of nowhere, it came to me with full force.
Last night, I dreamed that some evil force, or some wicked being was out to get me. And just like in all my similar dreams, I fought to preserve my life, and always, I succeeded. In this dream, however, the tables seemed to have turned on me, or fate had decided that it was finally time for me to do the contrary.
I am unable to recall the majority of the dream, it being that I forget about my dreams the second I emerge from the REM cycle, but there is one particular scene from my dream that I can recall clear as day.
Me, my sister Amber, and some others (who are mostly banished from my memory) were laying face-down on the floor. Amber was laying next to me and the others were all pleading to the killer(s) to spare our lives. There was lots of shouting being made by the killers, although, I am unable to recall their exact appearance. It seemed as if their physical form was non-existent; just evil entities that had power to control humanly, inanimate objects.
I can recall me and Amber huddling face-down on the floor. We were so close to one another, I could feel her hyperventilating breathes on my arm; however, I, for some reason remained silent. A feeling of calm, composure encompassed me; waiting for the next actions to be made. I then heard the sound of the gun go off, and Amber shrieked out loud. Soon, my right ear was flooded with the agonizing cries of Amber; frantic and helpless. I immediately knew that the object that emerged from the loud firing of the gun came into contact with the right side of my neck. I had been shot. I did not fight, nor did my body compulsively jerk around, but instead, I lay still, and sedated.
I felt the cold, hollowness from the bullet spread through the right side of my neck. I closed my eyes; accepting to whatever might come before me next, spiritually or in physical form. All was silent.
Then I awoke.
